Travelling— Part 1 Report

Suggestion: Be more concise and grammatically correct. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid fillers (uh, um), correct verb forms and word order, and add one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Keep it under five sentences.

Example: Yes, I do. I often look out of the window when I travel because the scenery helps me relax and makes the journey pass quickly. For example, I enjoy watching changing landscapes like fields and rivers, which calm me down during long trips.

Suggestion: Improve grammar (subject-verb agreement, tense consistency) and clarity. Give one concise specific example and use a linking phrase such as 'for example' or 'sometimes' without repetition. Limit to three sentences.

Example: Sometimes I do. For example, when I went to Bandung yesterday I saw several mountains that caught my attention, so I took photos to remember the view.

Suggestion: Answer directly with a clear topic sentence and then add one or two specific reasons using linking words (because, for example). Correct grammar (articles, verb tense) and avoid fillers. Combine short fragments into coherent sentences.

Example: I prefer the beach to the mountains because it is more tranquil and helps me relax. For example, when I visit the seaside I enjoy the fresh air and wide ocean views, which make me feel peaceful.

× Definitely yes, when I saw when I travelling, I like uh, look at the window and enjoy the scenery, the breathtaking feel, uh, it makes me uh, relax and pass the time.

✓ Definitely yes. When I travel, I like to look out the window and enjoy the scenery; it makes me relax and helps pass the time.

The original mixes past and present forms ('saw', 'travelling') and has incorrect verb patterns ('like uh, look' should be 'like to look' or 'like looking'). Use simple present 'travel' for habitual action. Use the infinitive 'to look' after 'like' for clarity, and adjust clauses to form complete sentences. Suggested improvement: Use consistent tense for routines (simple present) and correct verb patterns (like + to-infinitive or like + -ing).

× Yes, sometimes I take a picture if there is there are something that attract my attention.

✓ Yes, sometimes I take a picture if there is something that attracts my attention.

The phrase redundantly uses 'there is there are' and has a subject-verb agreement error ('something that attract' should be 'something that attracts'). Use a single 'there is' for singular 'something' and make the verb agree with the singular subject. Suggested improvement: Remove redundant words and ensure verb agrees with its subject; 'something' requires singular verb form.

× For example, when I went to Bandung uh, yesterday I saw several mountain, so I take picture.

✓ For example, when I went to Bandung yesterday, I saw several mountains, so I took pictures.

The sentence refers to a past event, so verbs should be in the past tense ('went', 'saw', 'took'). Also, 'mountain' should be plural 'mountains' and 'picture' should be plural 'pictures' or 'a picture' depending on meaning. Commas improve clarity. Suggested improvement: Keep all verbs in past tense for past events and use correct plural forms.

× To be honest, I prefer, I would prefer ma uh, beach, uh, rather than mountain.

✓ To be honest, I would prefer the beach rather than the mountains.

Use consistent modal 'would prefer' and include the definite article 'the' before 'beach' and pluralize 'mountain' to 'mountains' when comparing general categories. Remove filler sounds. Suggested improvement: Use 'would prefer the X rather than the Y' and ensure nouns are countable/plural where appropriate.

× This is because in beach I uh, it's a tranquil place.

✓ This is because the beach is a tranquil place.

The preposition 'in' is unnecessary; use the article 'the' with 'beach' as a specific place. The clause can be simplified: 'the beach is a tranquil place.' Suggested improvement: Use articles correctly and avoid unnecessary prepositions before locations when referring to a general place.

× I feel more relaxed when I visited there.

✓ I feel more relaxed when I visit there.

The sentence mixes present 'I feel' with past 'visited'. For general statements about how one feels when visiting, use simple present: 'I feel more relaxed when I visit there.' If referring to a specific past visit, use past consistently: 'I felt more relaxed when I visited there.' Suggested improvement: Keep tense consistent; choose present for habitual experiences and past for specific events.

× I can enjoy the breathtaking view.

✓ I can enjoy the breathtaking view.

This sentence is grammatically correct; no change needed. 'Breathtaking' correctly modifies 'view'. Suggested improvement: No change; maintain adjective before noun.

× Uh, I can get the fresh air sound.

✓ I can get the sound of fresh air.

The phrase 'fresh air sound' is unnatural. Reorder and add preposition 'of' to indicate the sound produced by fresh air: 'the sound of fresh air.' Alternatively, say 'I can enjoy the sound of the fresh air.' Suggested improvement: Use natural noun phrases like 'the sound of fresh air' or 'the fresh air' and include articles when needed.