Internet— Part 1 Informe

Sugerencia: 문법과 표현을 자연스럽게 고쳐야 합니다. 나이 표현은 ‘when I was 10’으로 하고, 과거 시제와 이유 연결은 ‘because’ 다음에 완전한 절을 사용하세요. 불필요한 말(Well, actually)을 줄이고 한두 문장으로 명확히 답하세요.

Ejemplo: I started using the internet when I was ten because I got my first smartphone at that time.

Sugerencia: 시간 표현과 어순을 바로잡고 연결어를 사용해 답을 매끄럽게 만드세요. 불필요한 망설임과 어색한 표현(‘go to the online’, ‘at least’)을 피하고 주어+동사+빈도/시간 순으로 말하세요.

Ejemplo: I go online quite often; usually I spend about three hours a day on the internet.

Sugerencia: 시제 일치와 자연스러운 표현을 사용하세요. ‘high school student’ 대신 ‘high school’ 또는 ‘when I was in high school’로 말하고, 과거 시제인 'didn't allow'를 사용하세요. 이유를 더 구체적으로 설명하면 좋습니다.

Ejemplo: Yes. When I was in high school, my parents didn't allow me to use my phone because they wanted me to focus on studying for exams.

Sugerencia: 문장 연결과 시제, 문장 분리를 개선하세요. 불필요한 단어('named')는 생략하고, 결과와 이유를 논리적으로 연결하세요. 간단한 후속 문장으로 해결책을 덧붙이면 더 좋습니다.

Ejemplo: Yes, I do. Last week I deleted Instagram because I was wasting a lot of time on it, so now I try to limit my social media use.

Sugerencia: 가정문 형태에 맞추어 답하세요(‘would’ 사용). 문장을 간결하게 하고 불완전한 문장을 완성하세요. 활동을 구체적으로 설명하면 신뢰성이 높아집니다.

Ejemplo: If I didn't have the internet, I would read books at home and go to the gym with my friends to stay active and social.

× Well, actually I started using Internet in 10 years old because I can got my cell phone.

✓ Well, actually I started using the internet when I was 10 years old because I got my cell phone.

The sentence mixes tenses and incorrect expressions: 'in 10 years old' should be 'when I was 10 years old' (age uses 'when I was'), 'Internet' should be lowercased, and 'can got' is ungrammatical—use simple past 'got' to match 'started'. Use consistent past tense for past events. Suggestion: Use 'when I was [age]' for age, lowercase 'internet', and match past tense verbs (started, got).

× Well, actually I go to the online quite often at least. Umm. 3 hours a day I usually.

✓ Well, actually I go online quite often, usually at least three hours a day.

Incorrect preposition 'to the online' should be 'go online'. Word order is awkward: adverbs like 'usually' and time expressions should be placed appropriately. Numbers in formal writing use words ('three'). Suggestion: Use 'go online', place 'usually' before time phrase, and write numbers as words in spoken-style formal correction.

× Yes I can. When I was in high school student I have to study a lot so my parents don't allow my mobile phone.

✓ Yes, I can. When I was a high school student I had to study a lot, so my parents didn't allow me to use my mobile phone.

Mismatch of tense and incorrect pronoun/object forms: 'was in high school student' should be 'was a high school student'. 'I have to study' should be past 'I had to study'. Negative 'don't allow my mobile phone' is wrong: use 'didn't allow me to use my mobile phone'. Suggestion: Use past tense for past situations and correct object/pronoun and verb patterns ('allow someone to do something').

× Yes, I think so. Last week I removed the application named Instagram because I waste a lot of time. Using that.

✓ Yes, I think so. Last week I removed the app Instagram because I was wasting a lot of time using it.

Tense and sentence fragmentation: 'I removed' is fine, but 'I waste a lot of time' should be past continuous 'I was wasting a lot of time' to describe habitual/repeated action in that period. 'Using that.' is a fragment; combine into 'using it'. Suggestion: Use past continuous for ongoing past actions and avoid sentence fragments by combining clauses correctly.

× In my case, I usually read a book in my home room and also. I go to the gym with my friend. It is really.

✓ In my case, I usually read books in my bedroom, and I also go to the gym with my friend. It's really enjoyable.

Several issues: 'read a book' can be pluralized to indicate habit ('read books')—singular/plural issue; 'home room' is incorrect for bedroom; 'also' placement and sentence fragments 'and also. I go...' and 'It is really.' are incomplete. Provide a complete adjective after 'really' such as 'enjoyable' or 'nice'. Suggestion: Use plural for habitual activities if appropriate, use 'bedroom' for the room you live in, place 'also' before the verb, and complete sentences with descriptive adjectives.