Shoes— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details with linking words. Avoid repetition ("collecting shoes" repeated) and correct singular/plural and article usage.

例: Yes, I enjoy buying shoes; I collect them as a hobby. For example, I usually buy new pairs every three months because I like to rotate styles for different occasions, and I choose shoes that balance comfort and appearance.

提案: Answer directly and correct grammar. Use linking words to explain reasons and give a specific example. Say "a shoe" or "shoes" and avoid vague phrasing like "kind of."

例: No, I haven't bought shoes online. Although I often browse online stores to compare styles, I prefer trying shoes on in person because I want to check the fit and comfort before I buy.

提案: Be more specific with amounts or ranges and use linking words to justify your choice. Provide a brief example of what you consider "worth the price."

例: I usually spend between $50 and $120 on a pair of shoes. I don't chase big brand names; instead I spend more on shoes that are comfortable and well-made, for example, a pair with good arch support that lasts a long time.

提案: Give a direct preference sentence and then support it with specific reasons and a linking word. Fix repetition and word choice ("more of my likings").

例: I prefer comfortable shoes rather than fashionable ones because I walk a lot during the day and need good support. However, I sometimes choose fashionable styles for special events when appearance matters.

× Collecting shoes is one of my guilty pleasure.

✓ Collecting shoes is one of my guilty pleasures.

The noun phrase 'one of my guilty pleasure' requires a plural noun after 'one of my' because it refers to one item from a group; therefore 'pleasure' must be plural 'pleasures'. Use 'one of my guilty pleasures' to be grammatically correct.

× Not annually, but quarterly.

✓ Not annually, but quarterly.

This fragment is acceptable as a short spoken answer; no tense change needed. (No correction required.)

× Collecting shoes means browsing to a lot of shop online or in the physical store.

✓ Collecting shoes means browsing many shops online or in physical stores.

Incorrect preposition and plural forms: 'browse to' is wrong—use 'browse' without 'to'. 'A lot of shop' needs plural 'shops' and 'online' modifies 'shops' so 'online shops' or 'shops online'. Use 'many' or 'a lot of' with plural noun. Also 'physical store' should be plural to match general meaning: 'physical stores'.

× But in my case, I never bought a shoes online because I am kind of vigilant and meticulous when it comes to buy.

✓ But in my case, I have never bought shoes online because I am kind of vigilant and meticulous when it comes to buying them.

Multiple issues: article 'a' before 'shoes' is incorrect because 'shoes' is plural and needs no indefinite article. Use present perfect 'have never bought' for experience up to now. 'When it comes to buy' is ungrammatical; use gerund 'buying'. Also refer back to 'shoes' with pronoun 'them' for clarity.

× I don't spend so much money when buying shoes, but I made sure that what I bought is worth the price.

✓ I don't spend much money on shoes, but I make sure that what I buy is worth the price.

Mixing present general habit and past tense: use present simple for habitual behavior ('I don't spend', 'I make sure'). Also use 'spend ... on' (preposition) and 'much' rather than 'so much' for neutral register. Use 'what I buy' to match present habit, not 'what I bought'.

× It's not about the brand, it's about the comfort and also the style.

✓ It's not about the brand; it's about comfort and style.

Stylistic improvement and redundancy: articles before uncountable nouns 'comfort' and 'style' are unnecessary. Replace the comma splice with a semicolon or separate sentences. 'Also' is redundant here.

× When it comes to choosing whether fashionable or comfortable, they are both worthy of choosing.

✓ When it comes to choosing between fashionable and comfortable shoes, both are worth choosing.

Use 'choosing between A and B' rather than 'choosing whether A or B'. 'They' is ambiguous; better to say 'both' and 'are worth choosing' (adjective 'worth' + gerund omitted but understood). 'Worthy of choosing' is wordy—'worth choosing' is natural.

× But for for me, comfortable shoes are more of my likings than fashionable shoes.

✓ But for me, comfortable shoes are more to my liking than fashionable shoes.

Duplicate 'for for' is a typo; 'more of my likings' is incorrect: use the fixed expression 'to my liking' or 'more to my liking' for preference. 'Likings' as plural is uncommon here; use 'liking' (singular, uncountable phrase).