Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and organize your answer with a clear topic sentence followed by two supporting details. Avoid repetition (e.g., 'especially' used twice) and correct small grammar issues. Use linking words like 'because' or 'and' to connect ideas smoothly. Also try to vary vocabulary (e.g., 'coastal scenery' instead of repeating 'beach' and 'smell').

例: I enjoy taking pictures of different views, especially coastal and rural scenes because they feel relaxing. For example, I like photographing the sea at sunset because the colours are beautiful and the fresh air creates a peaceful atmosphere. I also capture farms and countryside paths to show the quiet daily life there.

提案: Start with a clear topic sentence stating your preference, then give two specific reasons using correct grammar and linking words (e.g., 'because' and 'for example'). Avoid repetition and correct verb forms ('urban areas have', not 'is has'). Mention concrete images or activities to make your answer more vivid.

例: I prefer rural views to urban ones because rural areas offer more open spaces and natural scenes. For example, you can photograph beaches, farms, and wide fields, whereas cities often have limited views due to tall buildings and traffic.

提案: Give a clear direct answer (e.g., 'I prefer views in other countries') and explain why with specific reasons. Fix unclear phrases ('It's a reboot', 'I would like to struggle') and use linking words like 'because' and 'so'. Offer a brief example of what you would like to see abroad to make the response concrete.

例: I prefer views in other countries because I live in a city with limited scenery and old buildings. If I had the chance, I would visit coastal towns and mountain villages abroad to photograph different landscapes and cultures.

× 'Yes, I like taking pictures, especially when I travel in the rural area because especially the beach because it's so relaxing and I love fresh air.'

✓ 'Yes, I like taking pictures, especially when I travel to rural areas, particularly the beach, because it's so relaxing and I love the fresh air.'

'Issues: awkward present-tense phrasing and article use. Reason: use plural "rural areas" to match general statement; use preposition "to" with "travel to"; include definite article "the" before "fresh air". Suggestion: say "travel to rural areas" and "the beach" and "the fresh air" for natural present-tense general statements.'

× 'I love the smell of the sea, especially when it's sunset.'

✓ 'I love the smell of the sea, especially at sunset.'

'Issue: preposition choice. Reason: English uses "at sunset" to refer to that time of day rather than "when it's sunset." Suggestion: use "at sunset" for a natural expression.'

× 'I love the cold.'

✓ 'I love the cool weather.'

'Issue: word choice and register. Reason: "the cold" is grammatical but sounds abrupt; in context of seaside relaxation, "the cool weather" or "the cool breeze" is more natural. Suggestion: choose a noun phrase that matches context.'

× 'I do prefer in rural areas.'

✓ 'I prefer rural areas.'

'Issue: unnecessary auxiliary and preposition with present tense preference. Reason: "do prefer" is possible for emphasis but omits object; "in rural areas" is awkward without a verb like "live". Suggestion: use the concise "I prefer rural areas." or "I do prefer rural areas." for emphasis.'

× 'Then they open because urban areas is has a limited limited views and the old rural areas is you can go to the beach or in the farm.'

✓ 'Urban areas have limited views, while in rural areas you can go to the beach or to farms.'

'Issues: subject-verb agreement, incorrect articles, pluralization, and prepositions. Reason: "urban areas" is plural so use "have"; remove duplicate "limited"; use "rural areas" and plural "farms"; use "to" with "go to the beach" or "go to farms" or simply "go to the farm" if singular. Suggestion: restructure sentence: "Urban areas have limited views, while in rural areas you can go to the beach or to farms."'} ,{