Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be careful with grammar, word choice and clarity. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct countable nouns and articles, and avoid redundancy. Use linking words if you add details. For example, say you enjoy photographing different scenes, mention when you do it, why you do it, and give a brief specific example.

例: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views, especially when I visit a new place. I find photography a great way to preserve memories, and for example, when I visited the old town last month I took several photos of the streets at sunset.

提案: Improve accuracy, vocabulary and sentence structure. Give a clear topic sentence and then support it with specific reasons using linking words (because, for example, also). Replace awkward phrases with appropriate words (relax → relaxing; greenery skin in animals → lots of greenery and wildlife). Keep it concise (max 5 sentences).

例: I prefer rural areas because they are more natural and relaxing. For example, the countryside usually has lots of greenery and wildlife, and the quiet atmosphere helps me feel calm. Also, rural views often have interesting landscapes like fields and rivers.

提案: Avoid repetition and fix grammar and agreement (it have → it has). Start with a direct answer, then give 2–3 specific reasons using linking words (for example, because, and). Mention examples or a brief comparison to make it more vivid.

例: I prefer views in my own country because it has a great variety of natural scenery. For example, we have rivers, beaches and the Sundarbans with abundant wildlife, and these places offer spectacular landscapes that I love to photograph.

× Yes, I like taking picture in different views, especially when I go a new palace.

✓ Yes, I like taking pictures of different views, especially when I go to a new place.

Several article and word choice errors: 'picture' should be plural 'pictures' because taking photos is a general activity (singular/plural issue -> article errors). 'in different views' is incorrect preposition and noun choice; use 'of different views' (preposition use). 'a new palace' is likely intended as 'a new place'; 'palace' is a different meaning. Also missing 'to' before destination: 'go to a new place'. Suggestion: use 'pictures' for plural, 'of' when describing the subject of photos, 'go to' for visiting a location, and 'place' if you mean location rather than 'palace'.

× It a great way to capture our memories.

✓ It is a great way to capture our memories.

Missing verb 'is' causes a sentence without proper verb and subject-verb agreement error. The structure requires the copular verb 'is' after subject 'It'. Suggestion: include 'is' to form 'It is a great way...'. Also ensure pronoun 'our' matches speaker group.

× I prefer rural areas because rural areas are more natural and relax environment which have uh, greenery skin in animals.

✓ I prefer rural areas because they are more natural and relaxing environments with lots of greenery and wildlife.

Multiple issues: 'relax environment' uses adjective wrongly; should be 'relaxing environment(s)' or 'relaxed environment' (incorrect use of adjectives/adverbs). 'which have' is incorrect relative clause for plural 'areas' — use 'with' or 'that have' and ensure subject-verb agreement. 'greenery skin in animals' is incorrect phrasing; likely intended 'lots of greenery and animals/wildlife'. Suggestion: use 'they are' to avoid repetition, 'relaxing environments' or 'relaxed environment', and 'with lots of greenery and wildlife' for clear meaning.

× It's really amazing view.

✓ It's a really amazing view.

Missing article before 'really amazing view'. 'view' is countable and needs an article: 'a really amazing view'. Also 'It's' refers to 'It is', which is acceptable; add 'a' for grammatical correctness. Suggestion: include appropriate article before singular countable nouns.

× I prefer my country because our country is really amazing because of its river, sea, beach and Sundarbans which have so many animals and also it have some beautiful scenery.

✓ I prefer my country because it is really amazing because of its rivers, seas, beaches and the Sundarbans, which have so many animals, and it also has some beautiful scenery.

Several article and number errors: 'its river, sea, beach' should be pluralized depending on meaning; use 'rivers, seas, beaches' or specify with articles. 'Sundarbans' is a proper name requiring 'the Sundarbans'. 'which have' is correct for plural 'the Sundarbans', but later 'it have' is incorrect — subject 'it' (referring to country) requires 'has' (subject-verb agreement). Also punctuation and parallelism improved by listing and adding commas. Suggestion: pluralize geographic features when general, use 'the' before 'Sundarbans', and use 'has' for singular country.