Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise, avoid fillers (uh, um), and finish your thought. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific detail and a brief reason. Use linking words like 'because' or 'for example'. Keep it under five sentences.

例: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views, especially during trips and visits to historical places. For example, when I visit a monument with my family, I take photos to remember the architecture and the atmosphere. I also take group photos with friends so we can look back on our trips.

提案: Give a direct answer then support it with a specific reason and one example. Remove hesitations and unnecessary repetition. Use linking words like 'because' and 'for example' to structure the response.

例: I prefer rural views because I grew up in a village and they remind me of my childhood. For example, seeing open fields and trees brings back memories of playing outside with friends. Therefore, I find rural scenery more peaceful than busy city views.

提案: Answer directly and clearly, without vague fragments. State you prefer your country's views (if true) and give a specific reason or example, such as places visited or cultural features. Avoid filler words and keep to two or three sentences.

例: I prefer views in my own country because I know its landscapes and culture well. For instance, I have traveled to many regions here and enjoy trying local foods and seeing regional scenery, which makes these views more meaningful to me.

× Yes, I like to uh, take photograph uh, specially when I uh, go for a journey trip or when I visit some historical place, I, I take lots of photos there with my friends and family.

✓ Yes, I like to take photographs, especially when I go on a trip or when I visit historical places; I take lots of photos there with my friends and family.

Multiple errors: 'take photograph' uses incorrect singular/plural and noun form (Grammar problem type ID 1: Singular and plural issue); 'specially' is incorrect word choice, should be 'especially' (Grammar problem type ID 13: Incorrect use of adjectives or adverbs); 'go for a journey trip' is redundant and unidiomatic — use 'go on a trip' (Grammar problem type ID 26: Sentence structure errors / 11: Incorrect use of prepositions); run-on sentence with comma splicing should be corrected by punctuation or conjunction (Grammar problem type ID 26: Sentence structure errors). Suggestions: use plural 'photographs', replace 'specially' with 'especially', use the idiomatic preposition 'go on a trip', and break or join clauses correctly with a semicolon or conjunction.

× Actually, I prefer view of, uh, rural area.

✓ Actually, I prefer the views of rural areas.

'prefer view of rural area' has article and number errors: missing definite article and singular/plural mismatch (Grammar problem type ID 22: Article errors and ID 1: Singular and plural issue). Use 'the views' or 'rural areas' to be natural. Also prefer 'rural areas' plural to match general preference.

× I was born and raised in a village.

✓ I was born and raised in a village.

This sentence is grammatically correct and requires no change.

× And that's why when I visit an urban area, a rural area, it reminds me of my childhood memories when I used to play with my friends and I used to spend a lot of time in the nature.

✓ That's why when I visit an urban or rural area, it reminds me of my childhood memories when I used to play with my friends and spend a lot of time in nature.

Problems: awkward repetition 'a urban area, a rural area' and article misuse 'in the nature' (Grammar problem type ID 22: Article errors and ID 26: Sentence structure errors). Also redundant 'I used to' twice; keep one for conciseness (ID 26). Remove 'the' before 'nature' and combine 'urban or rural area'.

× And that's why I, I took.

✓ And that's why I take many photos.

Fragment and tense issue: 'I took' is an incomplete sentence and does not match present habitual context (Grammar problem type ID 23: Sentence without a verb / ID 6: Present tense issue). Use 'I take' for present habit or 'I took many photos' if referring to past visits. Suggestion: choose tense consistent with surrounding sentences.

× Honestly speaking, I have never been to any other countries except my country.

✓ Honestly speaking, I have never been to any other country except my own.

Plural vs singular and pronoun usage: 'any other countries' should be singular 'any other country' after 'never been to' when speaking generally, and 'my country' is better as 'my own' (Grammar problem type ID 1: Singular and plural issue and ID 12: Incorrect use of pronouns). Alternatively 'any other countries' can work with 'have never been to any other countries', but 'except my own country' is more natural.

× But uh, however, I like my, uh, the view of my country very much.

✓ However, I like the views of my country very much.

Redundancy and article use: 'But however' is redundant (Grammar problem type ID 16: Incorrect conjunction use). Also 'my, the view of my country' mixes possessive and definite article incorrectly (Grammar problem type ID 22: Article errors). Use one discourse marker ('However' or 'But') and 'the views of my country' or 'my country's views'.

× I visited lots of parts of this country and I, when I visit this country, uh, this visit the different places, I, uh, try new food.

✓ I have visited many parts of this country, and when I visit different places here, I try new food.

Tense consistency and word order: 'I visited' vs 'when I visit' mixes past and present (Grammar problem type ID 5: Past tense issue and ID 6: Present tense issue). Use present perfect 'have visited' for life experience. 'this visit the different places' is ungrammatical and redundant (Grammar problem type ID 26: Sentence structure errors). Also 'lots of parts' is informal; use 'many parts'. Reorder to 'when I visit different places here, I try new food' for clarity.