Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more grammatically correct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler (uh), correct verb forms and pronoun use, and add one specific detail or example. Use one or two linking words to connect ideas (for example, because, when).

例: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views because photography cheers me up when I feel sad. For example, I often photograph city sunsets or quiet park scenes, which help me relax and feel more positive.

提案: Give a clear topic sentence and add a specific reason for each preference. Use linking words (for example, however, because) and avoid vague phrases like "when I like to spend time." Keep answers within 2–3 sentences.

例: It depends on my mood. For example, I prefer urban views when I want energy and interesting architecture, but I choose rural views when I need peace and natural scenery because they help me unwind.

提案: Clarify the meaning (student said "boat" confusingly). Start with a direct answer (own country or other countries), explain the reason briefly, and avoid fillers. Use conditional linking words (if/when) and give a short specific example about travel or budget constraints.

例: I prefer views in other countries when I can afford to travel because I enjoy discovering new cultures and landscapes. However, if I don't have enough money, I usually stay in my own country and explore nearby towns and countryside instead.

× Yes I do taking pictures of different views because uh, it makes me happier while I'm being sad then I am taking pictures around me.

✓ Yes, I do take pictures of different views because it makes me feel happier when I'm sad, so I take pictures of my surroundings.

The student used the verb + -ing form incorrectly after 'do'. After auxiliary 'do' the base form of the main verb should be used (do take). Also 'being sad then I am taking pictures' is awkward: use 'when I'm sad, so I take pictures' for clarity. 'Makes me happier' is acceptable but 'makes me feel happier' is more natural; 'around me' -> 'my surroundings.' Suggestions: use base verb after 'do' and use concise time clauses like 'when I'm sad.'

× It depends on my mood. Sometimes I prefer views in urban areas and others rural areas when I like to spend time.

✓ It depends on my mood. Sometimes I prefer views in urban areas, and other times I prefer rural areas when I want to relax.

The original sentence is missing parallel structure and a verb in the second clause ('others rural areas' is not a complete clause). Use 'other times I prefer rural areas' to create parallel clauses and add a clearer purpose phrase ('when I want to relax' or 'when I want to spend time there'). Suggestions: keep parallel forms (Sometimes A, other times B) and include verbs for each clause.

× MMM, I prefer boat, uh, because when I have money then I prefer to other countries and when uh, I don't have money, then I prefer.

✓ Hmm, I prefer going abroad because when I have enough money I prefer to travel to other countries, and when I don't have money, I prefer to stay in my own country.

The student used 'I prefer boat' incorrectly; likely intended 'I prefer going abroad' or 'traveling by boat' but context asks country preference. Also 'prefer to other countries' is missing a verb and object: use 'prefer to travel to other countries.' The second clause 'then I prefer' is incomplete; add what they prefer (to stay in own country). Suggestions: state complete verbs and objects, use 'travel to other countries' and contrast with 'stay in my own country' for clarity.