Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Сократите запинки и лишние слова, улучшите грамматику и используйте связное предложение с ясной темой и поддерживающей деталью. Например, избегайте повторов «uh» и неправильных форм глаголов; вместо этого начните с прямого утверждения, затем добавьте одно конкретное объяснение или пример.

例: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different views because I find landscapes and cityscapes visually inspiring. For example, I like capturing quiet, symmetrical scenes like tree-lined streets or reflections in water because they look peaceful and balanced.

提案: Дайте чёткий ответ в начале и подтвердите его конкретным объяснением с использованием связующих слов (например, "because", "for example"). Избегайте неопределённых фраз и неправильных слов ("aesthetical" лучше заменить на "aesthetic"). Ограничьте ответ до 2–3 предложений.

例: I prefer urban views because I enjoy the variety and energy of city scenes. For example, I like photographing architecture and street life since they offer interesting shapes and vibrant colors.

提案: Выразите выбор ясно и приведите конкретную причину и пример. Уберите повторы и звуки сомнения. Используйте связку «because» или «so» для логичности, и два кратких предложения достаточно для полноты ответа.

例: I prefer taking photos in other countries because I want to discover new scenes and cultures. For example, when I travel abroad I often capture colorful markets and historic streets that I don't see at home.

× I like, uh, to taking photos, views like, uh, if it's uh, really statical, uh, I like a statical and don't land on my canal.

✓ I like taking photos of views, for example, if they are really static; I like static scenes and I don't include people in my shots.

The error involves incorrect use of the infinitive plus -ing (to taking). Use either the infinitive ('to take') or the gerund ('taking'), but not both. Also contains awkward word choice (statical -> static) and incorrect phrase 'don't land on my canal'. Suggestions: use 'taking photos of views', change 'statical' to 'static', and replace the unclear phrase with 'I don't include people in my shots' to convey the intended meaning.

× I don't know, but umm, let me see if it's really a statistical.

✓ I don't know, but let me see, if it's really aesthetic.

The student used 'statistical', which is incorrect in this context; the intended meaning is likely 'aesthetic' (an adjective describing appearance). 'Statistical' relates to statistics. Suggestion: use 'aesthetic' to describe visually pleasing views.

× As I told you, I will take anything that aesthetical.

✓ As I told you, I'll take anything that is aesthetically pleasing.

'Aesthetical' is not the correct form here; use the adjective 'aesthetic' or the adverb 'aesthetically' with 'pleasing'. Also the relative clause needs a verb: 'that is aesthetically pleasing'. Suggestion: use 'is aesthetically pleasing' for clarity.

× Maybe it's umm I prefer views in or urban areas.

✓ Maybe, I prefer views in urban areas.

The sentence has disfluent and incorrect filler words 'it's umm I' and an extra 'or'. Simplify to a clear statement 'Maybe, I prefer views in urban areas.' Suggestion: remove unnecessary fillers and the extra conjunction.

× I'd prefer views in, uh, another country 'cause I have visited my country and I also, uh, take a pictures, uh, a views of my country.

✓ I'd prefer views in another country because I have visited my country and I also took pictures of its sights.

Errors include incorrect article usage 'a pictures' and 'a views', and tense inconsistency: 'have visited' (present perfect) is fine, but 'take' should be past 'took' to match the implied completed action. Also use 'because' instead of colloquial ''cause'. Suggestion: use correct articles ('pictures', no 'a') and past tense 'took'. Replace 'my country' repetition with 'its sights' or similar.

× So I want to, uh, take something new and uh, we did another country and take atmospheres and beautiful photos.

✓ So I want to take something new; I want to visit another country and capture its atmosphere and take beautiful photos.

This sentence contains incorrect tense and structure: 'we did another country' is ungrammatical, and 'take atmospheres' is awkward. The intention is to express desire to visit another country and photograph its atmosphere. Suggestion: use 'visit another country' and 'capture its atmosphere' or 'take beautiful photos' with consistent infinitive forms.