Views— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Shorten and clarify your response. Start with a direct topic sentence (Yes, I enjoy taking pictures), then give one clear supporting detail and an example. Avoid redundancy ("different views", "different kinds") and minor grammar errors (remove extra words like "with" after "picture" and say "scenery" or "scenic view"). Keep it to 2–3 sentences and use a linking word if adding an example.

例: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views. For example, when I see a scenic view, I usually take a photo on my phone to save the memory so I can revisit that moment later.

提案: Be direct and clear about your preference and give specific reasons. Start with a topic sentence (I prefer rural/urban), then explain why with one or two precise reasons and an example. Avoid vague phrases ("there are some", "in my opinion" repeated) and correct grammatical mistakes ("countries like China, me, America" is incorrect). Use linking words such as "however" to contrast.

例: I generally prefer rural views because they are quieter and more natural. However, I admire the urban skylines of places like China and the United States because their city planning and modern architecture are impressive.

提案: Answer directly and avoid awkward phrasing. Begin with a clear topic sentence (I prefer views in other countries), then give specific reasons and one concrete example. Correct collocations ("astonishing architects" should be "astonishing architecture" or "dramatic buildings") and grammar (use "prefer" + gerund). Keep within 2–3 sentences and use a linking word like "because" to connect ideas.

例: I prefer views in other countries, especially Europe, because I admire their historic architecture and well-preserved cityscapes. For example, I enjoy studying the design of old cathedrals and how European streets blend public spaces with buildings.

× Yes, and that is one of my habits of taking different kinds of pictures in different life scenarios.

✓ Yes, and one of my habits is taking different kinds of pictures in various life situations.

The original sentence is awkwardly structured. Use the gerund phrase 'taking different kinds of pictures' as a subject complement after 'one of my habits is'. Also replace 'different life scenarios' with the more natural 'various life situations'. Suggestion: Use 'one of my habits is + -ing' for clarity.

× So for example, whenever I see a beautiful scenery view, I'll usually take a picture with from my phone and keep it as a memory so that I can revisit that moment.

✓ For example, whenever I see a beautiful view, I usually take a picture with my phone and keep it as a memory so that I can revisit that moment.

Problems: 'scenery view' is redundant; 'I'll usually' mixes future with habitual action—use simple present 'I usually' for habits. 'take a picture with from my phone' has an extra preposition 'from'. Correct structure: 'take a picture with my phone'. Suggestion: Use simple present for habitual actions and avoid redundant nouns.

× Well, there are some. They are pretty subjective in my opinion.

✓ Well, preferences are somewhat subjective, in my opinion.

The original 'Well, there are some.' is a fragment lacking a clear noun referent. Better to state the subject: 'preferences are somewhat subjective.' This fixes the sentence structure and clarifies meaning. Suggestion: Avoid short fragments that lack a clear subject.

× Like in my country, I usually don't like the urban areas because they are not well organized in my opinion.

✓ In my country, I usually don't like urban areas because, in my opinion, they are not well organized.

Placement of 'like' and punctuation made the sentence informal and slightly awkward. 'the urban areas' is overly specific; 'urban areas' is better. Also move 'in my opinion' to a clearer position and use commas for readability. Suggestion: Place adverbial phrases where they clarify tone and meaning.

× But countries like China, me, America have very astonishing urban city views.

✓ But countries like China and the United States have very impressive urban views.

The original incorrectly includes 'me' among countries—'me' is the wrong pronoun. Use 'the United States' instead of 'America' for formality and pair countries with 'and'. 'Astonishing urban city views' is redundant; 'impressive urban views' is clearer. Suggestion: Do not list yourself as a country; use correct country names and avoid redundancy.

× To be specific, I usually don't like my view, the views that my country delivers me.

✓ To be specific, I usually don't like the views my country offers.

'My view, the views that my country delivers me' is unidiomatic and uses incorrect verb 'deliver' with 'me'. Use 'offers' and remove redundant 'my view'. Suggestion: Use 'views my country offers' for natural phrasing.

× I rather like different European countries that have astonishing architects and buildings.

✓ I prefer various European countries that have remarkable architecture and buildings.

'I rather like' is nonstandard; use 'I prefer' or 'I quite like'. 'Astonishing architects' is incorrect—people (architects) are not what is meant; use 'architecture'. Suggestion: Use 'architecture' to refer to building styles and 'prefer' for comparisons.

× I love watching them and understanding the process of how they were made.

✓ I love looking at them and understanding how they were made.

'Watching' is acceptable but 'looking at' is more natural for buildings; 'the process of how they were made' is wordy—'understanding how they were made' is concise. The tense 'were made' (past passive) is appropriate to describe construction history. Suggestion: Use concise phrasing for clarity.