Music— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be clearer and more natural: start with a direct topic sentence stating your preference, then give one or two specific reasons with linking words. Correct grammar (singular/plural, articles) and avoid unclear phrases. Keep to under five sentences and use specific examples or feelings to support your view.

例: I prefer sad music because it helps me feel and understand deep emotions. For example, when I listen to a slow piano song, I can reflect on memories and feel empathy for the singer. This makes sad music comforting rather than depressing.

提案: Answer directly, then add one or two clear supporting details using linking words. Improve grammatical accuracy (prepositions, verb forms) and use concrete examples of situations where happy music excites you. Avoid trailing or unsure phrases.

例: Yes, happy music often makes me feel excited. For instance, when my family and I drive on a holiday, upbeat songs lift our mood and make the journey more fun. Also, when I travel abroad, cheerful music helps me feel energetic and optimistic about exploring new places.

× And papers that may take over happy music.

✓ I prefer sad music over happy music.

The original sentence uses incorrect pronouns and words ('papers', 'take over') that do not fit the intended meaning. This is a sentence structure and vocabulary issue best classified as incorrect use of pronouns because 'And papers' is not a valid subject. Correction: use the subject 'I' and the verb 'prefer' to express preference, and the preposition 'over' to compare two types of music. Suggestion: use 'I prefer X to Y' or 'I prefer X over Y' to state preferences. Grammar problem type ID:12

× That is because it gives me feeling of empathy.

✓ That is because it gives me a feeling of empathy.

The phrase omits the article 'a' before 'feeling'. This is an article/quantifier issue: 'feeling' here is a singular noun and requires an article. Also 'gives me feeling' is ungrammatical; use 'gives me a feeling of empathy' or 'makes me feel empathy'. Suggestion: include appropriate articles ('a') before singular, countable nouns. Grammar problem type ID:14

× I take moment when I listen to sad musics.

✓ I take a moment when I listen to sad music.

'Moment' is a singular countable noun and needs the article 'a'. 'Music' is an uncountable noun in English and should not be pluralized as 'musics'. This is a singular/plural and article error. Suggestion: use 'a moment' and the uncountable noun 'music'. Grammar problem type ID:1

× Yes, sometimes when I go to trip with my family, driving with having music makes me enthusiastic and also in another situation like.

✓ Yes, sometimes when I go on a trip with my family, driving while listening to music makes me feel enthusiastic, and also in other situations, like going abroad.

Multiple issues: 'go to trip' is incorrect — use 'go on a trip'. 'Driving with having music' is ungrammatical; use 'driving while listening to music'. 'Makes me enthusiastic' is acceptable but 'feel enthusiastic' is more natural. The fragment 'and also in another situation like. Going abroad?' is a sentence fragment and punctuation error; combine into 'and also in other situations, like going abroad.' These are present-tense and sentence structure problems. Suggestion: use correct prepositional phrases ('go on a trip'), the gerund 'listening', and avoid sentence fragments by completing the clause. Grammar problem type ID:6