Music— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and grammatical. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give 1–2 specific supporting details and a linking word. Avoid filler sounds (e.g. "mmm") and repetition ("hear to listen"). Also correct verb forms and pronouns (e.g. "it depends on my mood" + "I prefer happy music when I feel down").

例: It depends on my mood. If I’m feeling down, I prefer happy music because upbeat songs lift my spirits and help me focus. For example, I often play energetic pop tracks when I’m stressed to cheer myself up.

提案: Give a clear direct answer then support it with a reason and a specific example. Use correct sentence structure and linking words (e.g. "because", "for example"). Avoid awkward phrases like "found melody"; instead say "have uplifting melodies" or "catchy rhythms".

例: Yes, absolutely — happy music makes me feel more excited because it has uplifting melodies and fast rhythms that raise my energy. For example, when I listen to a lively song, I feel motivated to move and sing along.

× MMM it depends on my mood.

✓ MMM, it depends on my mood.

This sentence is correct in tense but needs a comma after the interjection MMM to follow punctuation conventions; no tense change required. Suggest adding the comma to improve clarity.

× If I feel down right now, I would like to.

✓ If I feel down right now, I would like to listen to sad music.

The original sentence ends with an incomplete phrase 'I would like to.' which creates a sentence structure error because the object or action is missing. To complete the conditional meaning, add the action 'to listen to sad music.' The conditional 'If I feel' is a present real condition and pairs naturally with 'I would like' to express preference; ensure the object of 'would like' follows.

× I would prefer to hear to listen to happy music so you can cheer me up.

✓ I would prefer to listen to happy music so it can cheer me up.

The phrase 'to hear to listen to' is redundant and incorrect; choose one verb phrase. Also 'so you can cheer me up' assumes the listener will cheer the speaker; context suggests the music, not the examiner, cheers them. Replace with 'so it can cheer me up.' This fixes redundancy and clarifies the subject of 'cheer.'

× Yes absolutely happy the happy songs found melody which is like make me feel happier.

✓ Yes, absolutely. Happy songs have melodies that make me feel happier.

The original sentence has multiple problems: wrong word order, incorrect verb form 'found' instead of 'have' or 'contain,' and an unnecessary filler 'which is like.' Correcting to 'Happy songs have melodies that make me feel happier' uses present simple correctly to describe a general truth. Also add punctuation to separate interjections ('Yes, absolutely.') and use 'that' to introduce the relative clause. Suggestions: use simple present for general statements, avoid fillers like 'which is like,' and ensure subject-verb agreement ('songs have').