Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct and grammatically correct, use a clear topic sentence, and give concise supporting details with linking words. Correct tense and subject-verb agreement are needed (use past tense for childhood). Avoid repetition and unclear pronouns. For example, start with a clear sentence like “No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child.” Then briefly explain why using a linking word: “because” or “as,” and give one specific detail about the rule and how it affected you.

例: No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child. This was because in my country children under 18 are not allowed to ride motorcycles, so my parents wouldn’t buy one for me. As a result, I usually walked or used public transport to go to school.

提案: Give a concise, well-structured opinion with a topic sentence, then add specific supporting details and a linking word. Avoid filler words and repetition. Use precise vocabulary (e.g., “popular among young people,” “commute”) and complete your sentences. Mention reasons and one example or comparison to strengthen your answer.

例: Yes, bikes are very popular in India, especially among young people. This is because they are affordable and convenient for commuting to work or university in busy cities. For example, many students and office workers use motorcycles to avoid traffic and save time.

× No, I do not have a bike.

✓ No, I did not have a bike.

The question asks about the past ('when you were a child'), so the verb should be in past tense. Use 'did not have' to match the time frame. Suggestion: use past simple for situations that occurred in the past.

× I do not had a bike when I was travelling because in my country he because according to my country rules if the child, if the child is not 18 plus the he or she cannot drive a bike or a car.

✓ I did not have a bike when I was growing up because in my country, according to the rules, if a child is not over 18, he or she cannot drive a bike or a car.

Multiple errors: incorrect tense ('do not had' mixes present auxiliary with past participle) and awkward phrase 'when I was travelling' should refer to childhood; word order and articles are incorrect. Use past simple 'did not have.' Replace 'when I was travelling' with 'when I was growing up' to match 'child.' Use 'according to the rules' and 'if a child is not over 18' for clear grammar and register. Remove redundant 'the' and fix pronoun placement.

× in my country he because according to my country rules if the child, if the child is not 18 plus the he or she cannot drive a bike or a car.

✓ In my country, according to the rules, if a child is not over 18, he or she cannot drive a bike or a car.

The original repeats pronouns and inserts 'he' incorrectly. Use a consistent structure: 'if a child is not over 18, he or she cannot...' Also add commas and 'In my country' capitalized. Avoid unnecessary repetition.

× Yes, bikes are more or less bikes are popular in my home country India because umm in most of these young generation prefer to buy prefer the bikes to go anywhere like their workplace, universities and so on.

✓ Yes, bikes are more or less popular in my home country, India, because most of the younger generation prefer to buy bikes to go to places like their workplaces and universities.

Redundant phrase 'bikes are more or less bikes are' should be simplified. 'young generation' is better as 'younger generation.' Use plural agreement 'prefer to buy bikes' and preposition 'go to places' or 'go to their workplaces.' Add commas around 'India.' Ensure subject-verb agreement: 'most of the younger generation prefer' or 'the younger generation prefers'—both acceptable; here 'prefer' matches 'most people.'

× But I also prefer to bike because it is a 2 Wheeler and it.

✓ But I also prefer riding a bike because it is a two-wheeler and convenient.

Original ends abruptly and uses infinitive 'prefer to bike' awkwardly. Use gerund 'riding a bike.' Spell out 'two-wheeler' and add an adjective ('convenient' or another reason) to complete the sentence. This fixes sentence fragment and improves register.