Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be direct and use correct tense and grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence (Yes, I did), then add one or two specific supporting details. Use correct noun and verb forms (elementary student → elementary school; enjoyed riding the bike). Keep it under five sentences and use a linking word if adding a reason or example.

例: Yes, I did. When I was in elementary school I owned a small blue bike, and I usually rode it home from school every day. Because my house was near a park, I often spent an extra hour riding there with friends after finishing homework.

提案: Give a clear opinion first, then support it with a specific reason and an example. Avoid filler words (umm, uh) and incorrect expressions (famous of the bike). Use comparative phrases correctly (more popular in Thailand and some East Asian countries). Keep to a maximum of five sentences and use linking words such as however or because.

例: I don't think bikes are very popular in my country. Compared with Thailand and some East Asian countries, fewer people use bicycles because our cities lack safe bike lanes. For example, most people prefer cars or motorcycles for long commutes, although biking is common for short trips in some smaller towns.

× Yes, I have.

✓ Yes, I did.

The question uses past tense 'Did you have', so the student should reply in past tense. 'I have' is present perfect and mismatches. Use simple past 'I did' or 'Yes, I had' depending on meaning. Suggestion: respond with 'Yes, I did' to match the past-tense question.

× When I was elementary students I had a bike personally, so usually after school I enjoyed it to have the bike.

✓ When I was in elementary school I had my own bike, so I usually enjoyed riding it after school.

Multiple errors: 'elementary students' is incorrect noun phrase; correct phrase is 'elementary school'. 'Personally' is unnecessary and awkward; 'my own' expresses ownership. 'Enjoyed it to have the bike' is ungrammatical: the verb 'enjoy' should be followed by a gerund for the activity (riding), or rephrase to 'enjoyed riding it'. Word order and verb forms adjusted. Suggestion: use 'When I was in elementary school' and 'I usually enjoyed riding it after school.'

× I think umm the bikes bikes.

✓ I think bikes are popular in some places,

The student repeats 'bikes' and provides a fragment; subject-verb agreement and sentence completeness are needed. 'I think bikes are...' requires a verb. Suggestion: complete the sentence with a verb phrase, e.g., 'I think bikes are popular in some places.'

× It is not famous in my country, unlike the Thailand or East Asians.

✓ They are not common in my country, unlike in Thailand or some East Asian countries.

Using 'the Thailand' is incorrect: country names do not take 'the'. Also 'famous' is awkward for objects; use 'common' or 'popular'. 'East Asians' refers to people; use 'East Asian countries' or 'in East Asia'. Suggestion: 'They are not common in my country, unlike in Thailand or other East Asian countries.'

× Uh is famous of the bike, but my country is not famous.

✓ Bicycles are popular there, but they are not popular in my country.

'Is famous of the bike' is incorrect preposition and structure. 'Famous of' is not used in English. Use 'popular' or 'common' and correct prepositional phrases: 'popular in' a place. Suggestion: say 'Bicycles are popular there, but they are not popular in my country.'