Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Be more concise and correct grammar; start with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler (umm), and give one specific supporting detail. Use correct articles and word order (e.g., "in Japan"). Keep to 2–3 sentences and connect ideas with a linking word such as "because" or "so."

例: No, I didn’t have a bike when I was a child. My mother usually drove us everywhere, and in Japan public transportation is excellent, so we didn’t need one.

提案: Be accurate with vocabulary and grammar, and organize reasons with linking words. Replace informal phrases like "like" and incorrect words ("lentil") with precise terms ("rental bikes" or "bike-sharing"). Use comparative grammar correctly ("faster and cheaper") and keep to 2–3 sentences.

例: Yes, I think bikes have become very popular recently. For example, bike-sharing services and rental bikes are widespread, and because bus fares have risen, cycling is often faster and cheaper for short trips.

× I did not have a bike when I was a child because my mom always used to drive us everywhere that we want to go and also we Japan has a excellent umm, public transportation like trains, so we don't need.

✓ I did not have a bike when I was a child because my mom always used to drive us everywhere that we wanted to go, and also in Japan we have excellent public transportation like trains, so we didn't need one.

Multiple tense inconsistencies and sentence structure problems: 'we want to go' should be past tense 'we wanted to go' to match 'did not have' and 'used to'. 'We Japan has' is incorrect word order and missing preposition; correct is 'in Japan we have'. 'a excellent' uses incorrect article before a vowel sound; use 'an excellent', but here 'excellent public transportation' needs no indefinite article and 'trains, so we didn't need one' clarifies the object. Suggestion: keep verb tenses consistent (past) and fix word order and articles; split long clause with commas for clarity.

× Yes, I do think that bikes are popular in my country especially these days.

✓ Yes, I do think that bikes are popular in my country, especially these days.

Missing comma for clarity rather than a grammar category from the list; however this sentence is chiefly fine grammatically. Suggestion: add a comma before the adverbial phrase 'especially these days' to improve readability.

× There's like a lentil bicycle that you can rent easily to use and also the bus fee is getting high so it is more faster and cheaper for short trips.

✓ There are rental bicycles that you can rent easily, and also the bus fare is getting high, so they are faster and cheaper for short trips.

Multiple errors: 'There's like a lentil bicycle' is wrong vocabulary and number agreement: use 'There are rental bicycles' (plural) or 'There is a rental bicycle service'. 'rent easily to use' is wordy; 'you can rent easily' suffices. 'bus fee' is better as 'bus fare'. 'it is more faster' is incorrect comparative: 'more faster' is redundant; use 'faster'. Also subject agreement: 'they are faster and cheaper' referring to bicycles (plural). Suggestion: use correct vocabulary ('rental'), correct comparative form, match subject and verb number, and use 'fare' for cost.