Bike— Part 1 採点レポート

提案: Correct the tense and remove repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence (past tense) and add one or two specific details using a linking word. Keep it natural and concise (no more than 5 sentences). For example, mention who gave the bike or where you rode it and why you enjoyed it.

例: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child, and I used it almost every day. For example, my parents gave it to me for my eighth birthday, so I often rode it to the park to meet friends and feel independent.

提案: Avoid filler sounds (e.g., 'uh') and use correct verb forms. Give a concise opinion first, then support it with specific examples and a linking word. Use varied vocabulary (e.g., commute, errands) and correct articles/infinitives.

例: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country because they are cheap and convenient. For instance, many people ride them to commute to work or to run small errands, such as going to the market or visiting neighbors.

× Yes, I have a bike when when I was a child and I loved using it daily.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was a child and I loved using it daily.

The sentence mixes present tense 'have' with the past time marker 'when I was a child.' Use past tense 'had' to match the past time. Also remove the duplicated 'when'. Suggestion: use consistent past tense for actions or states that occurred in childhood: 'I had a bike.'

× Yes, uh, bikes are popular in our country today. We use it going to the market to buy something and to go home.

✓ Yes, uh, bikes are popular in our country today. We use them to go to the market to buy things and to get home.

There are several issues: 'bikes' is plural so the pronoun should be plural 'them' (incorrect use of pronouns and subject-pronoun agreement related to present tense usage). 'We use it going to the market' is ungrammatical; use the infinitive 'to go' after 'use' for purpose: 'use them to go to the market.' Also 'something' is vague and should be plural when speaking generally: 'things.' Finally, 'to go home' is acceptable but 'to get home' is more natural. Suggestion: ensure pronouns agree with nouns and use 'use + object + to + verb' for expressing purpose.