Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is generally clear and relevant, but has grammatical errors, some redundancy and an unfinished ending. Aim to use a clear topic sentence, correct verb forms, and avoid repeating ideas. Use one linking phrase to add support and finish your thought. Keep it within 3–4 sentences.

예시: Yes, I enjoy photographing different views. I particularly like natural scenery because it often has striking colors and textures, so I’m more enthusiastic about taking photos of it. However, I sometimes photograph urban scenes too when they have interesting architecture or lively street life.

제안: Good content and a clear personal opinion. Improve fluency by removing filler sounds, using consistent capitalization and choosing precise vocabulary (e.g., 'peace of mind' not 'Peace of Mind'). Add one linking phrase to connect reason and result and keep it concise (2–3 sentences).

예시: I prefer rural areas because I enjoy natural scenery. For example, being in the countryside relaxes me and helps me think clearly, so I often go for walks there to calm my mind.

제안: Your idea is good but the answer is repetitive and has hesitation and grammar issues (double 'I', 'like changing' is unclear). Make a clear topic sentence stating your preference, then give two concise reasons using linking words (e.g., 'because' and 'for example'). Avoid repeating phrases.

예시: I prefer views in other countries because I enjoy experiencing new landscapes and cultures. For example, visiting another country lets me see different architecture and meet local people, which helps me understand how they live.

× I like taking pictures of a variety of views and it depends on the view would be my enthusiasm to taking the picture or not.

✓ I like taking pictures of a variety of views, and whether I take a picture depends on how enthusiastic I am about the view.

This sentence has awkward structure and incorrect verb forms. 'it depends on the view would be my enthusiasm to taking the picture or not' mixes clauses incorrectly and uses 'to taking' (wrong form). I rephrased to a clearer subject-verb structure: 'whether I take a picture depends on how enthusiastic I am about the view.' Use 'whether' to introduce alternatives, 'depends on' followed by a noun clause, and 'enthusiastic' (adjective) with 'am' rather than 'would be'. Suggestion: Use clear clause connectors (whether/because) and maintain correct verb forms (infinitive vs gerund).

× So if it was a natural scenery, I would definitely take a picture of it.

✓ So if it were natural scenery, I would definitely take a picture of it.

The phrase 'a natural scenery' is incorrect: 'scenery' is an uncountable noun and should not take 'a'. Also, in a hypothetical conditional referring to an unreal present situation, the subjunctive 'were' is preferred after 'if'. I removed the article and changed 'was' to 'were'. Suggestion: Treat 'scenery' as uncountable (no 'a') and use 'if...were' for hypothetical present conditions.

× If it was something related to the urban life, of course I would, but I would.

✓ If it was something related to urban life, of course I would take a picture as well.

The original repeats 'I would' and ends abruptly, lacking an object or verb. 'The urban life' is unnatural; 'urban life' without 'the' is better. I completed the sentence by adding 'take a picture' to show the intended action. Suggestion: Avoid unnecessary repetition and ensure each clause has a verb and object to complete the idea.

× I would say uh, rural areas because I really like the views of the natural scenery.

✓ I would say rural areas because I really like views of natural scenery.

'The views of the natural scenery' is wordy and uses unnecessary article 'the'. 'Views of natural scenery' is more natural. Also remove filler 'uh' in formal responses. Suggestion: Drop unnecessary articles with uncountable nouns and avoid filler sounds in prepared answers.

× Uh, it gives a personal Peace of Mind and the clarity to think umm, and it helps with meditation and feeling peaceful throughout the day.

✓ It gives me a personal peace of mind and clarity of thought, and it helps with meditation and feeling peaceful throughout the day.

Capitalization of 'Peace of Mind' is incorrect; common nouns should be lowercase. 'Gives a personal peace of mind' needs an indirect object 'me' to show who benefits. 'Clarity to think' is awkward; 'clarity of thought' is idiomatic. Remove filler 'Uh' and 'umm'. Suggestion: Use idiomatic phrases ('peace of mind', 'clarity of thought') and include the indirect object when appropriate.

× There are a variety of views on my country, but for me I would say I I would rather choose a view of a different country because I like changing and I like seeing different views from different places, from different countries to know the place and how it is and the people and the natural scenery, the urban area.

✓ There are a variety of views in my country, but I would rather choose a view from a different country because I like change and I enjoy seeing different places, their people, natural scenery, and urban areas.

Problems: 'on my country' should be 'in my country' (preposition error). Duplicate 'I I' is a repetition. 'Choose a view of a different country' is awkward; 'a view from a different country' is clearer. 'I like changing' is wrong; use 'I like change' (noun) or 'I like to change' (verb). The long list at the end was ungrammatical and repetitive; reorganized into a parallel list: 'their people, natural scenery, and urban areas.' Suggestion: Use correct prepositions ('in' for locations), avoid repeated words, prefer 'change' as a noun for this context, and use parallel structures for lists.