Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and avoid repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific details using linking words. Also correct small grammar mistakes (e.g., “different types of pictures”, “when I go hiking”).

예시: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures when I travel. For example, I often photograph mountain landscapes while hiking and coastal scenes when I visit beaches, because I like capturing natural light and textures.

제안: Reduce fillers (uh), avoid repeating the same idea, and use linking words to add a reason and an example. Fix grammar: use singular/plural correctly and choose precise vocabulary (e.g., “rural areas,” “varied landscapes”).

예시: I prefer views in rural areas because they have abundant greenery and varied landscapes. For example, I enjoy photographing rolling hills and small rivers, which feel more peaceful than busy city scenes.

제안: Give a clear direct answer first, then support it with specific examples. Correct grammar (subject-verb agreement: “every country has”; “my country has better views”) and avoid trailing off. Name places accurately and finish the sentence.

예시: I think every country has its own special views, so I cannot pick one as the best. For instance, I admire the Blue Mountains in Australia, Sanga Beach in Canada, and the Himalayan scenery around Himachal Pradesh in India because each offers unique landscapes and light for photography.

× Yes, I love taking pictures while I go out.

✓ Yes, I love taking pictures when I go out.

Use 'when' rather than 'while' for habitual actions; both are possible but 'when I go out' sounds more natural for regular activities. Also no -ing form error here but replaced for clarity.

× I love traveling so I take different type of pictures like for mountains while I while hiking and while going to the river or looking for the beach and in greenery as well.

✓ I love traveling, so I take different types of pictures, for example of mountains when I go hiking, and of rivers, beaches, and green landscapes.

'type' should be plural 'types' to agree with 'different'. Use consistent noun forms: 'mountains' -> 'of mountains', 'rivers' instead of 'going to the river'. Break long run-on sentence into clearer phrases.

× So at that time I click.

✓ So at that time I take photos.

'click' is informal; 'take photos' is standard. Also clarify tense and verb choice: 'click' alone is not idiomatic here.

× Actually, I prefer, uh, the views in the rural areas because there is a lot of greenery and I love the, uh, environment a lot.

✓ Actually, I prefer the views in rural areas because there is a lot of greenery and I really love the environment.

Remove unnecessary definite article before 'rural areas' unless referring to specific ones. Improve word order and reduce filler words. 'a lot' repeated; use 'really' for emphasis.

× So that is why I like the rural area.

✓ So that is why I like rural areas.

Use plural 'rural areas' or remove 'the' if speaking generally. 'the rural area' implies a specific area, which is not intended.

× There are a lot of different landscapes in rural area, so that is why I prefer rural radius.

✓ There are a lot of different landscapes in rural areas, so that is why I prefer rural regions.

'rural area' should be plural 'rural areas' to match 'a lot of'. 'rural radius' is incorrect; likely intended 'rural areas' or 'rural regions'.

× Every country have their own views, so I cannot say that my country have a better views or the other countries.

✓ Every country has its own views, so I cannot say that my country has better views than other countries.

'country' is singular so use 'has'. 'their' should be 'its' to match singular antecedent or use pluralize 'countries have their'. 'a better views' is incorrect: use 'better views' and compare with 'than' not 'or'.

× Uh, I love the Blue Mountains, the, uh, the Sangha beach in Canada and uh, I love Himachal Pradesh and uh, being around Sisu in.

✓ I love the Blue Mountains, Sangha Beach in Canada, Himachal Pradesh, and being around Sissu.

Remove redundant definite articles before proper names ('the Sangha beach' -> 'Sangha Beach'). Fix place name 'Sisu in' to 'Sissu' (assuming common proper noun) and simplify structure. Use commas to list items.