Views— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve grammar and conciseness: correct verb agreement (e.g., "it makes me"), remove redundancy, and keep answers within 2–4 sentences. Add a clear topic sentence, then one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Also vary vocabulary slightly (e.g., "scenery" instead of repeating "views").

예시: I love taking pictures of different scenery. For example, when I walk by the nearby river at sunset, I photograph the colorful sky and the trees because the light makes the scene look peaceful and cheerful.

제안: Work on coherence, reduce fillers (uh, 'cause), and correct grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence stating preference, then give two specific reasons using linking words (for example, "first", "also"). Use precise vocabulary ("less polluted", "open fields", "cyclists"). Keep to 2–4 sentences.

예시: I prefer rural views because they are much less polluted and feel fresher. For example, rural areas often have open fields, cyclists on country lanes, and birds singing, which creates a calm atmosphere.

제안: Clarify the position and correct grammar. Begin with a clear direct answer (e.g., "I prefer views in other countries") then give specific reasons with linking words ("because", "for instance"). Avoid vague phrases like "a new surrounding"; be specific about cleanliness, maintenance, or landscape. Keep to 2–3 concise sentences.

예시: I prefer views in other countries because public spaces there tend to be cleaner and better maintained. For instance, I notice well-kept parks and tidy streets abroad, which make the scenery more attractive.

× Whenever I go out on a walk in the morning or in the evening, I take the pictures of the sunsets, the trees, as there's a nearby river.

✓ Whenever I go out for a walk in the morning or in the evening, I take pictures of the sunsets and the trees because there is a nearby river.

Incorrect use of preposition and articles and awkward conjunction. 'Go out on a walk' is less natural than 'go out for a walk' (preposition choice, ID 11). 'Take the pictures' should be 'take pictures' (article error, ID 22). 'As' used to mean 'because' is informal and awkward here; use 'because' for clarity. Combined issues fixed to make a natural present habitual sentence. Suggestion: Use 'go out for a walk', drop unnecessary 'the' before 'pictures', and use 'because' to link clauses.

× And so I go there, sit there, watch the sunset and it make me feel really happy.

✓ And so I go there, sit there, watch the sunset, and it makes me feel really happy.

Subject-verb agreement error: the subject 'it' requires the third-person singular verb form 'makes' not 'make' (ID 27). Also added commas to clarify the series of actions. Suggestion: Ensure verbs agree with their subjects; for 'it' use 'makes'.

× I prefer the views in rural areas 'cause there is no pollution there and as well as an urban areas, the skies filled with pollution and it's so suffocating there.

✓ I prefer views in rural areas because there is no pollution there, whereas in urban areas the skies are filled with pollution and it feels suffocating.

Multiple issues: ' 'cause' is informal; replace with 'because' (conjunction choice, ID 16). 'As well as an urban areas' is incorrect structure and has article error ('an' with plural 'areas') (ID 22). 'The skies filled with pollution' lacks verb 'are' (sentence without a verb/verb omission, ID 23). Also 'it's so suffocating there' is awkward; 'it feels suffocating' is clearer. Suggestions: Use 'whereas' to contrast, ensure correct articles and include the verb 'are' for 'skies are filled'.

× And As for the rural areas, I would like to say that, uh, there are a lot of fields which make me feel everything special.

✓ As for rural areas, I would like to say that there are a lot of fields that make everything feel special to me.

Awkward plural/singular and relative clause ordering: 'which make me feel everything special' is ungrammatical and awkward. Use 'fields that make everything feel special to me' to correct meaning and order (singular/plural and sentence structure, IDs 1 and 26). Also remove unnecessary 'the' before 'rural areas'. Suggestion: Use 'that' for defining relative clauses and place 'feel' after the object for natural phrasing.

× The persons going on a bike and, uh, birds chirping around.

✓ People riding bikes and birds chirping around.

'The persons' is unnatural and incorrect quantifier/article use; use 'people' (quantifier/article error, ID 14 and 22). 'Going on a bike' should be 'riding bikes'. The fragment lacked a verb to connect; this correction makes it a noun phrase that fits the preceding sentence. Suggestion: Use 'people' and 'riding bikes' for natural English.

× Actually, I don't prefer views like I don't prefer the most views in my own country 'cause there is a lot of garbage here and there and in the foreign countries there are a lot of cleanliness, a new place and a new surrounding.

✓ Actually, I don't prefer most views in my own country because there is a lot of garbage here and there, while foreign countries often appear cleaner with new places and surroundings.

Mixed and incorrect tense/aspect and awkward phrases: 'I don't prefer the most views' is incorrect quantifier and word order (IDs 14 and 26). 'In the foreign countries there are a lot of cleanliness' is ungrammatical; 'cleanliness' is an uncountable noun and requires rephrasing (ID 13). Use present simple to express general preference. Suggestion: Use 'most views' without 'the', replace 'a lot of cleanliness' with 'appear cleaner', and pluralize 'surroundings'.

× So that's make it really special.

✓ So that makes it really special.

Subject-verb agreement error: 'that' (referring to the situation) requires 'makes' (third-person singular), not 'make' (ID 27). Also 'that's' (contraction of 'that is') followed by 'make' is incorrect; use 'that makes'. Suggestion: Ensure verb agrees with subject; use 'that makes'.