Music— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is understandable but a bit repetitive and imprecise. Start with a clear topic sentence that directly answers the question, then give one or two specific reasons with linking words. Avoid repeating phrases like “sometimes” and replace vague words (e.g. “that vibe”) with concrete descriptions (e.g. “energy” or “comfort”). Keep it within 3–4 sentences.

예시: I usually choose music based on my mood: happy music when I need energy and sad music when I want to feel comfort. For example, upbeat pop helps me concentrate and feel motivated, whereas slow acoustic songs help me reflect after a stressful day. Therefore, I switch between the two depending on how I want to feel.

제안: This answer is unclear and uses vague phrases like “doesn't give me that much vibe” and repeats “sometimes.” Begin with a direct response (yes/no/it depends), then explain why with a specific example. Use linking words (however, instead, because) to make your reasoning coherent and avoid repetition.

예시: Not always — it depends on the song. Happy music doesn't always excite me because I often focus on the melody rather than the beat. However, melancholic songs sometimes affect me more deeply because the lyrics remind me of personal experiences, which makes the emotion stronger.

× It actually depends on my mood, sometimes I feel I should listen sad music for a better mood or sometimes I feel no, I should hear some loud music so that I also have that vibe sometimes.

✓ It actually depends on my mood. Sometimes I feel I should listen to sad music to improve my mood, and other times I think I should listen to loud music to get that vibe.

Original sentence is a run-on with missing prepositions and awkward phrasing. Errors include incorrect or missing preposition 'to' after 'listen' (Grammar Problem Type ID 11), sentence structure issues from comma splicing and repetition (Type 26), and article/word choice problems ('listen sad music' should be 'listen to sad music'). Suggestion: split into two clear sentences or use a coordinating conjunction, include the preposition 'to' after 'listen', replace 'for a better mood' with 'to improve my mood', and streamline redundant words. Grammar problem type ID: 11,26

× From my side, I would say that it's different from me because when I hear a happy song it doesn't give me that much vibe.

✓ From my side, I would say it's different for me because when I hear a happy song it doesn't give me much of a vibe.

Problems include incorrect preposition 'from' vs 'for' in this context (Grammar Problem Type ID 11) and awkward noun phrase 'that much vibe' which needs 'much of a vibe' or 'that much of a vibe' (Grammar Problem Type ID 13). Suggestion: use 'different for me' and 'much of a vibe' to sound natural and concise. Grammar problem type ID: 11,13

× But sometimes when I listen sad music, I think it hits me sometimes.

✓ But sometimes when I listen to sad music, I think it really hits me.

Missing preposition 'to' after 'listen' (Grammar Problem Type ID 11) and redundant 'sometimes' repeated twice causing awkwardness (Grammar Problem Type ID 26). Also 'think it hits me sometimes' is better as 'think it really hits me' to convey meaning clearly (Grammar Problem Type ID 13). Suggestion: add 'to' after 'listen', remove redundancy, and use 'really' for emphasis.