Relax— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Make the response more natural, grammatical and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Correct prepositions and unnecessary words, and avoid sentence fragments.

예시: I usually go to the nearby park to relax. For example, I take a 30-minute walk there because the fresh air and greenery help reduce my stress.

제안: Clarify and correct grammar (e.g., "by myself", "others' feelings"). Use a linking word to connect the reason and give one specific example. Keep it within 3–4 sentences and avoid redundancies.

예시: I usually relax by myself because I can do whatever I want without worrying about others' feelings. For instance, I often listen to music or take a long walk, which helps me unwind and clear my mind.

제안: Combine short fragments into a smooth, natural answer. Reduce fillers like "umm". Use a linking phrase and a concrete example of a music type to show a range of vocabulary.

예시: Yes, I find music very relaxing. When I'm stressed, I usually listen to soft acoustic or classical music because it calms my mind and helps me focus on my breathing.

제안: Avoid repetition and correct phrasing (e.g., "by myself", "recently" with present simple). Provide one clear routine and a specific detail about timing or frequency to make the answer more concrete.

예시: To relax, I usually listen to music or take a long walk by myself, especially in the evenings after work. Doing this for about 30–40 minutes helps me clear my mind and sleep better.

× I always go to the near park to that myself because walking in the park can help me to. Reduce my pressure and feel the fresh air.

✓ I always go to the nearby park by myself because walking in the park helps me reduce my stress and feel the fresh air.

Errors: 'the near park' uses wrong article and adjective form; 'to that myself' is incorrect phrase; sentence split incorrectly with a period; 'help me to. Reduce my pressure' is ungrammatical and 'pressure' wrong collocation. Corrections: use 'the nearby park' or 'a nearby park' depending on context; use 'by myself' for 'alone'; use 'helps me reduce my stress' (present simple for habitual action and correct collocation); combine into one sentence. Suggestion: use adjective 'nearby' and 'by myself', keep present simple for habits, and use 'stress' instead of 'pressure'.

× I prefer to relax with myself because at that moment I can do whatever I want to do without caring for others feelings.

✓ I prefer to relax alone because at that moment I can do whatever I want without worrying about other people's feelings.

Errors: 'relax with myself' is unnatural; use 'alone' or 'by myself'. 'Without caring for others feelings' is incorrect pronoun and missing possessive apostrophe; 'others feelings' should be 'other people's feelings'. Also 'caring for' is wrong collocation here — use 'worrying about'. Suggestion: use 'alone' or 'by myself', use 'other people's feelings' and 'worry about' for correct collocation.

× For example, I often listen to the music or go for long work which helps me to unwind and clear my mind.

✓ For example, I often listen to music or go for a long walk, which helps me unwind and clear my mind.

Errors: 'the music' should be 'music' (no article for general activities). 'long work' is wrong word choice; correct is 'a long walk'. 'helps me to unwind' can be 'helps me unwind' (both correct but shorter is natural). Also missing comma before 'which'. Suggestion: use correct nouns ('music', 'a long walk') and place comma before non-restrictive clause.

× When I feel stressed I always listen to music for relaxing.

✓ When I feel stressed, I always listen to music to relax.

Errors: 'for relaxing' is incorrect phrase; use infinitive 'to relax' to express purpose. Also missing comma after adverbial clause. Suggestion: use 'to relax' for purpose and add comma after 'When I feel stressed'.

× Different kinds of music can umm. Express different feelings and it can comfort me.

✓ Different kinds of music can express different feelings and can comfort me.

Errors: Sentence was split awkwardly with filler 'umm.' and a period causing 'Express' to be capitalized incorrectly; redundancy 'and it can' can be tightened. Corrections: remove filler, join clauses, and use parallel verbs 'can express' and 'can comfort'. Suggestion: avoid fillers and maintain smooth clause structure.

× Recently, I always listen to music or go for a long walk with myself when I feel stressed.

✓ Recently, I have often listened to music or gone for a long walk by myself when I feel stressed.

Errors: 'Recently, I always listen' mixes 'recently' with simple present 'always listen' — use present perfect for recent habitual actions. 'with myself' should be 'by myself'. Suggestion: use present perfect ('have listened', 'have gone') for actions in a recent period, or change adverbials to match simple present.

× During that period, I can relax myself and clear my mind.

✓ During that time, I can relax and clear my mind.

Errors: 'During that period' is wordy; 'relax myself' is unnecessary reflexive — 'relax' is intransitive here. Corrections: use 'during that time' or 'during that period' is acceptable but simpler 'time' preferred; drop reflexive pronoun. Suggestion: avoid unnecessary reflexive pronouns with intransitive verbs.