Work— Part 1 Relatório

Sugestão: Be concise and correct vocabulary. Start with a clear topic sentence stating your role, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid unnecessary repetition and grammatical errors (e.g., "a college home" -> "a college cafeteria").

Exemplo: I work as a cashier in my college cafeteria. I handle payments for items such as coffee, tea and desserts, and I also give change and receipts to customers.

Sugestão: Answer directly and use correct nouns. Begin with a clear sentence stating the location, then add one specific detail. Correct wrong words ("question" -> "cashier", "on frozen" unclear). Use linking words if needed.

Exemplo: I work in the college cafeteria on campus. They mainly sell drinks and quick snacks such as samosas and frozen items.

Sugestão: Give a clear reasoned answer with coherent linking words. Start with a topic sentence, then explain with specific reasons and correct phrases (e.g., "attend classes and work easily", "save money for my studies"). Avoid unclear phrases like "save my money for the comments."

Exemplo: Yes, it's a good place to work because it's on the same campus where I study, so I can easily combine work and classes. Also, the salary helps me save money for my tuition.

Sugestão: Use fluent, grammatically correct sentences and give one or two specific points. Use linking words like "although" or "because". Correct tense and phrasing ("I have learned about the products", "I didn't know the names before").

Exemplo: Yes, I like working there. Although it can be busy at times, I have learned a lot about the different drinks and frozen snacks, which I didn't know before.

Sugestão: State a clear plan and give specific, realistic details. Use correct verb forms and linking words to explain reasons. Instead of vague phrases like "industrial and business," say "open a small restaurant or café" and explain steps you will take.

Exemplo: In the future I plan to open a small restaurant or café. I hope to use the skills and knowledge I gain from working in the cafeteria, such as menu planning and customer service, because there is steady demand for drinks and snacks.

× I am working in a college home as a cashier.

✓ I work at a college as a cashier.

The original uses progressive tense and 'college home' which is incorrect. Use simple present 'I work' to describe a regular job and preposition 'at' with 'college'. Suggestion: Use simple present for habitual actions and 'at a college' for location.

× I collect the cash from the person who purchased the things for me.

✓ I collect the cash from the people who purchase items for me.

Plural and habitual action require plural and simple present. 'Person who purchased' (past) is inconsistent; use 'people who purchase' and 'items' instead of 'things' for clarity. Suggestion: Use simple present for routine actions and match singular/plural.

× For example, they purchased the coffee, green tea, desserts, and so on.

✓ For example, they purchase coffee, green tea, desserts, and so on.

Using past tense 'purchased' conflicts with a general example. Also articles before uncountable items (coffee, green tea) are unnecessary. Use simple present for habitual/general statements. Suggestion: Use simple present and avoid unnecessary articles with uncountable nouns.

× I work as a question in a college cafeteria in which only the on frozen products are available and drinks.

✓ I work as a cashier in a college cafeteria where only frozen products and drinks are available.

Original has multiple errors: 'question' is incorrect word choice for 'cashier'; word order and extra words ('the on') are wrong. Use 'where' for relative clause and correct noun order 'frozen products and drinks are available'. Suggestion: Choose correct job title and simplify clause with 'where'.

× Drinks are also, for example samosas.

✓ We also sell snacks, for example samosas, along with drinks.

Original sentence is ungrammatical and unclear. 'Drinks are also, for example samosas' mixes categories. Clarify that snacks such as samosas are sold as well. Suggestion: Rephrase to state what is sold together and give example.

× Yes, it is a good place to work because I go in the same college, I studied in the same college, I work at that place and it's easy for me to handle both the things at the time and save my money for the comments.

✓ Yes, it is a good place to work because I attend the same college, I studied here, and I work there, so it is easy for me to manage both things at the same time and save money for my expenses.

Multiple issues: tense and verb choice ('go in' -> 'attend' or 'go to'), repetition, unclear phrase 'save my money for the comments' (probably 'expenses'). Use parallel structure and correct idioms: 'manage both things at the same time' and 'save money for my expenses'. Suggestion: Use consistent simple present for routines, parallel clauses, and common collocations like 'save money' and 'expenses'.

× Yes, I would like the place where I work.

✓ Yes, I like the place where I work.

Using 'would like' suggests desire rather than current liking. Simple present 'I like' correctly expresses that the student likes the workplace now. Suggestion: Use simple present for current states or preferences.

× It is quite uh busy sometimes, but I have get knowledge regarding the frozen products and drinks.

✓ It is quite busy sometimes, but I have gained knowledge about the frozen products and drinks.

'Have get' is incorrect verb form. Use present perfect 'have gained' to show experience acquired up to now, and use 'about' or 'on' for topics. Suggestion: Use 'have' + past participle for present perfect: 'have gained'.

× Before this I will not know the names of all drinks.

✓ Before this, I did not know the names of all the drinks.

Original mixes future 'will' with past context. Use simple past 'did not know' to refer to a past lack of knowledge. Add 'the' before 'drinks' for specificity. Suggestion: Use past tense when referring to past lack of knowledge.

× My future work plans to set up a one restaurant business, industrial and business.

✓ My future plan is to set up a restaurant business.

Original is ungrammatical and wordy: 'work plans to set up a one restaurant business, industrial and business' is confusing. Simplify to 'My future plan is to set up a restaurant business.' If the student means multiple areas (industrial and commercial), they should state that clearly. Suggestion: Use 'My future plan is to...' and then clearly define the business type.

× I want to take some knowledge from the cafeteria and future that business is successful because everybody wants drinks.

✓ I want to learn from the cafeteria so that my future business will be successful because everyone buys drinks.

Problems: 'take some knowledge from' is awkward; use 'learn from'. 'Future that business is successful' is ungrammatical; use 'so that my future business will be successful'. 'Everybody wants drinks' is better as 'everyone buys drinks'. Suggestion: Use purpose clause 'so that' and natural verbs: 'learn from' and 'everyone buys drinks'.