旅行— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and correct small grammatical errors. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Avoid redundancy like ‘I feel happy’ right after similar ideas.

範例: Yes, I always look out the window, especially in rural areas because the green fields and rolling hills are relaxing. For example, seeing farmers working or small streams often refreshes my mind and lifts my mood.

建議: Fix grammar and clarity, avoid repetition, and complete your thought. Use linking words to organize details (e.g., 'for example' or 'especially'). Be specific about what you photograph and why, and keep it within 3–4 sentences.

範例: Yes, I often take photos from the car, especially when we cross a bridge and I can see a river and boats below. For example, I try to capture reflections on the water and dramatic skies because those moments look best in photos.

建議: Provide a clear topic sentence, then add one specific reason with a linking word and an illustrative example. Remove repeated words and minor hesitations to sound more natural.

範例: I prefer the mountains because I enjoy the quiet and the panoramic views. For instance, when I visited Nepal and Bhutan I watched sunrises from mountain ridges, and the changing light over the valleys felt incredibly peaceful.

× Yes, I always do it. I love specially rural areas because the greenery and the landscape is good to look at and it keeps my mind refreshed and I feel happy.

✓ Yes, I always do. I especially love rural areas because the greenery and the landscape are pleasant to look at; they keep my mind refreshed and make me feel happy.

Problems: incorrect adverb placement and form ('specially' should be 'especially'); article and word choice ('the greenery and the landscape is' — subject-verb agreement: plural subject requires plural verb); awkward phrasing 'is good to look at' and repeated 'I' clauses. Suggestions: use 'especially' before the verb it modifies, ensure subject-verb agreement by using 'are' with the compound subject, and replace 'is good to look at' with a more natural adjective like 'pleasant to look at'. Combine clauses to avoid repetition and improve flow.

× Yes, that is another thing I regularly do, especially when the car or the vehicle is moving on a bridge and I I can see the river and I can see both floating over it.

✓ Yes, that is another thing I regularly do, especially when the car is moving on a bridge and I can see the river and boats floating on it.

Problems: repeated word 'I I' (typing error) and awkward phrasing 'car or the vehicle' (redundant), incorrect phrase 'can see both floating over it' (unclear 'both' and preposition). Suggestions: remove repetition, choose one noun ('car'), clarify what is floating (boats) and use correct preposition 'on' for objects floating on a river. This fixes sentence structure and clarity.

× I try to capture that moment on my phone and I also try to capture if the sky is very.

✓ I try to capture that moment on my phone, and I also try to capture the sky when it looks dramatic or especially beautiful.

Problems: sentence is incomplete ('if the sky is very' lacks an adjective) and repetitive ('I try to capture' twice). Suggestions: complete the idea by adding what the sky is (e.g., 'dramatic' or 'especially beautiful'), and combine clauses to avoid repetition.

× I prefer the mountains. I have traveled to mountainous countries like Nepal and Bhutan. I love the scenery at the top of the mountains, so I I love to watch sunrise from the top. It's quite a pleasant experience.

✓ I prefer the mountains. I have traveled to mountainous countries like Nepal and Bhutan. I love the scenery at mountain summits, so I love to watch the sunrise from the top; it's a very pleasant experience.

Problems: repeated 'I I' (typo) and article use ('watch sunrise' should be 'watch the sunrise'). Also 'the top of the mountains' can be made more concise ('mountain summits' or 'the top'). Suggestions: remove the repeated word, include the definite article before 'sunrise', and streamline wording for natural English.