视图— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and fluent: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler words (uh, repeated I), and add one specific detail about what you enjoy photographing. Use one or two linking phrases for coherence.

範例: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different views. For example, I often photograph sunsets and city skylines because they capture the mood of a place, and later I look at these images to remember who I was with and how I felt.

建議: Give a direct topic sentence, correct grammar (both → both types/areas), and use linking words to compare (whereas, while). Provide one concrete example for each area to make your answer specific.

範例: I prefer both urban and rural views because each tells a different story: urban areas offer striking architecture and vibrant street scenes, whereas rural areas provide peaceful landscapes and nostalgic farms.

建議: Begin with a clear, direct sentence and avoid starting with conjunctions like 'But'. Combine reasons with linking words (for instance, because, while) and correct minor grammar (sceneries → scenery). Give one vivid specific example of a foreign country you want to visit.

範例: I enjoy views both at home and abroad because each offers something different: for instance, my country’s northern mountains have breathtaking scenery and a peaceful climate, while I would love to visit Japan to experience its coastal landscapes and unique cultural scenes.

× I like to collect the pictures of the places I have been.

✓ I like collecting pictures of the places I have been.

Using 'like' with activities can take either the infinitive or the -ing form. In conversational English, 'like collecting' sounds more natural and concise than 'like to collect the pictures of'. Also remove the article 'the' before 'pictures' for general meaning: 'collecting pictures' refers to the hobby in general. Suggestion: Use 'I like collecting pictures of places I have been.'

× I sometimes, uh, open the photos and see the memories of how it felt with the people I, I, I am with and uh yeah.

✓ I sometimes open the photos and relive the feelings I had with the people I was with.

The original sentence has filler words and awkward tense choice. 'See the memories of how it felt with the people I am with' mixes present and past. Because the photos remind the speaker of past experiences, use past tense 'I was with' and a clearer verb such as 'relive'. Also remove unnecessary commas and filler to improve fluency. Suggestion: Use clear verbs and consistent past tense for memories.

× Well I prefer the both areas because these both have different way of telling the stories.

✓ Well, I prefer both areas because each has a different way of telling stories.

'The both' and 'these both' are incorrect; use 'both' without 'the' or 'these'. Also 'different way' needs singular/plural agreement with subject: use 'each has a different way' or 'they have different ways'. 'Telling the stories' is overly specific; 'telling stories' is more natural. Suggestion: Use 'both areas' and match verb and noun number: 'each has a different way' or 'they have different ways'.

× Like for example in urban areas they are the buildings which are very aesthetic and when it comes to the rural areas it is more kind of nostalgic.

✓ For example, urban areas have buildings that are very aesthetic, while rural areas feel more nostalgic.

The phrase 'they are the buildings which are very aesthetic' is awkward and has incorrect subject-verb structure; 'urban areas have buildings' is clearer. 'It is more kind of nostalgic' mixes singular 'it' with a plural idea and an incorrect adverb phrase; use 'feel more nostalgic' for describing rural areas. Also 'which' can be replaced by 'that' or a reduced clause. Suggestion: Keep subject and verb aligned and use 'feel' to describe general impressions.

× But I prefer both my own country and the foreign countries to explore.

✓ I prefer exploring both my own country and foreign countries.

The original places 'but' unnecessarily and uses 'the foreign countries' with incorrect article usage for general meaning. 'Both my own country and foreign countries' should be the objects of 'exploring', so rephrase to 'I prefer exploring both...'. Suggestion: Use parallel structure and remove unnecessary articles.

× For example, my country, the northern mountains have breathtaking sceneries and a very peaceful climate.

✓ For example, in my country the northern mountains have breathtaking scenery and a very peaceful climate.

The clause needs a preposition 'in my country' for clarity. 'The northern mountains' is fine, but 'sceneries' is uncountable in this sense; use 'scenery'. Also punctuation: remove the comma after 'country' or rewrite to integrate the phrase. Suggestion: Use 'scenery' (uncountable) and include 'in' for location: 'in my country the northern mountains...'.

× And uh, I would love to explore the foreign countries because of the landscape and cultures.

✓ I would also love to explore foreign countries because of their landscapes and cultures.

'And uh' is filler; remove it for clarity. 'The foreign countries' is too specific; use 'foreign countries'. Also 'because of the landscape and cultures' should use possessive 'their' and plural 'landscapes' to match 'countries'. Suggestion: Use 'I would also love to explore foreign countries because of their landscapes and cultures.'