视图— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise, correct grammar and avoid repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific reasons with linking words. Reduce hesitations and incorrect articles/capitalization.

範例: Yes, I enjoy taking photos of different views because they help me capture memorable moments. For example, I often photograph cityscapes for their dramatic skylines and seashores for calming sunsets, so I can revisit those feelings later.

建議: Answer directly with a clear reason and give a specific supporting example. Fix grammar (singular/plural, verb forms) and avoid vague claims like 'sense of achievement' without explanation.

範例: I prefer urban views because they show modern architecture and lively streets, which keep me informed about city life. For instance, photographing a new skyline or busy market makes me feel connected and proud of capturing dynamic scenes.

建議: Clarify meaning and use precise vocabulary. State your position then explain with concrete reasons and examples. Avoid contradictory phrases (assimilate into our local culture vs. other countries) and correct grammar and article use.

範例: I prefer views in other countries because seeing different landscapes and architecture exposes me to new cultures. For example, visiting a historic district or a rural village abroad taught me local customs and broadened my perspective, which I find mentally refreshing.

× Yes, of course, I'm taking photos of various views because it helped me to capture the memorable moment.

✓ Yes, of course, I take photos of various views because they help me capture memorable moments.

The original sentence mixes tenses and uses an incorrect past participle 'helped' with present context. Use simple present 'take' for habitual action and 'help' to agree with plural noun 'photos'. Also 'the memorable moment' is unnatural; use plural 'memorable moments' or 'a memorable moment'. Avoid contraction 'I'm taking' which implies ongoing action rather than habit.

× Additionally, I think it is very interesting.

✓ Additionally, I think it is very interesting.

This sentence is grammatically acceptable; no change needed. The adverb placement is correct. Left unchanged to reflect the student's intended meaning.

× I can appreciate them at any time and at anywhere, and I especially like the cityscape and the umm Sea seashore, because this is really beautiful.

✓ I can appreciate them at any time and anywhere, and I especially like the cityscape and the seashore because they are really beautiful.

Remove redundant preposition 'at' before 'anywhere' (use 'at any time and anywhere' or better 'anytime and anywhere'). Capitalization: 'Sea' need not be capitalized. Use 'seashore' or 'seashore' without 'the umm Sea seashore' and make subject-verb agreement: 'they are' to refer to 'cityscape and seashore'. Also 'this is' is incorrect for plural; replace with 'they are'.

× Of course, I love urban area because it keep me updated on the latest news.

✓ Of course, I love urban areas because they keep me updated on the latest news.

Use plural 'urban areas' or the singular with article 'the urban area'. Subject-verb agreement: plural subject 'urban areas' takes plural verb 'keep' but with 'they keep'. Original 'it keep' mismatches (singular subject with plural verb). Use 'they keep' when referring to 'urban areas'.

× Additionally, I think it is a really good way to help me and cultivate our sense of achievement and confidence.

✓ Additionally, I think it is a really good way to help me cultivate my sense of achievement and confidence.

Pronouns must be consistent: 'me' should pair with 'my' rather than 'our' unless including others. Original mixed 'me' and 'our' is inconsistent. Also remove unnecessary 'and' before 'cultivate' since 'help me cultivate' is the correct structure.

× Umm yeah, that is all.

✓ Umm, yeah, that's all.

This is an informal closing; grammatically acceptable. Correction standardizes contraction 'that's' for natural speech. No major grammar error.

× In another country, because the forum views help me assimilate into our local culture and strengthen our national cohesion.

✓ In another country, because the foreign views help me assimilate into the local culture and strengthen national cohesion.

'Forum views' is likely a misused phrase; 'foreign views' fits meaning. Prepositions and articles: use 'the local culture' or simply 'local culture' and 'national cohesion' without 'our' for neutrality. Also sentence fragment: original is a fragment following a question; it should be connected to a main clause but corrected preserves intended meaning.

× A Furthermore, I think umm accumulate different kind of culture, help me to expand our horizon, which is really beneficial to our mental health.

✓ Furthermore, I think that experiencing different kinds of culture helps me expand my horizons, which is really beneficial to my mental health.

Multiple issues: 'A Furthermore' incorrect—use 'Furthermore'. 'accumulate different kind of culture' is ungrammatical; use 'experiencing different kinds of culture' or 'different cultures'. Subject-verb agreement: singular 'experiencing...' takes 'helps'. Pronouns must be consistent: replace 'our horizon' with 'my horizons' to match 'me'. Remove unnecessary 'to' after 'help'. Use plural 'horizons' for natural collocation.