视图— Part 1 評分報告

建議: Be more concise and direct. Start with a clear topic sentence, avoid filler words (yeah, umm, like), and give one or two specific examples with a brief reason. Use linking words (for example, especially) correctly and limit to 3–4 sentences.

範例: Yes, I enjoy taking pictures of different views. I particularly like photographing sunsets because the colours change rapidly, creating dramatic photos. I also sometimes take pictures of mountains and valleys for their textures and scale, which give interesting perspectives.

建議: Give a direct preference and a clear reason. Avoid saying you have never been — that confuses the question. Use linking phrases (because, so) to justify your choice and remove lengthy hesitation. Keep it to 2–3 sentences with specific details about what appeals to you in urban views.

範例: I prefer views in urban areas because I enjoy city skylines and modern architecture. For example, I like photographing illuminated buildings and busy streets since they offer interesting light and movement. I hope to visit such places when I have the chance.

建議: Provide a clear topic sentence stating your preference, then give specific examples and correct names if possible. Avoid repetition and hesitations; use linking words (for example, especially, such as) and complete sentences. Mention one or two specific sites or types of views and why you prefer them.

範例: I prefer views in my own country because I know the culture and history well. For example, Myanmar has many historic sites such as Bagan, which offers thousands of ancient temples and stunning sunrise views. These places are meaningful to me and offer unique photo opportunities.

× Yeah, That's a really good question.

✓ Yeah, that's a really good question.

Capitalization error: 'That's' should not be capitalized after a comma in the middle of a sentence. Use lowercase 'that's' to maintain correct sentence casing and punctuation. (Note: This issue maps to 'Incorrect conjunction use' since a direct category for capitalization isn't listed.)

× As a girl who loves taking photos whenever I see something, Yeah, I like taking pictures of different views, especially the sunset and sometimes the mountains, the valleys or something, like something that is really uncatching for me. Yeah.

✓ As a girl who loves taking photos whenever I see something, I like taking pictures of different views, especially sunsets and sometimes mountains and valleys or other scenes that really attract me.

Several issues: unnecessary repetition of 'Yeah' and awkward phrase 'uncatching' (incorrect word choice). Pluralize countable nouns when used generally: 'sunset'→'sunsets', 'mountains, the valleys'→'mountains and valleys'. Replace 'something that is really uncatching for me' with 'scenes that really attract me' to convey intended meaning. The main corrections relate to gerund phrasing and noun plurality. (Suggested types: Verb + -ing form and Singular and plural issue.)

× Umm, actually I've never been to these places though.

✓ Umm, actually I have never been to those places.

Use 'those' instead of 'these' when referring to places not present or previously mentioned in the immediate context. Contraction 'I've' is acceptable, but expanded form 'I have' is clearer. This is a present perfect usage with demonstrative adjective correction. (Type: Present tense issue / Incorrect use of pronouns.)

× I don't have a specific answer, but if I have to choose one I will probably choose urban areas because I've seen that a lot on social media and I've been wanting to go there one day if I have enough money to support myself and like to umm to keep myself from like umm.

✓ I don't have a specific answer, but if I had to choose I would probably pick urban areas because I have seen them a lot on social media, and I would like to visit one day if I have enough money to support myself.

Conditional tense correction: use second conditional 'if I had to choose' with 'would' for hypothetical choice. Use plural consistency 'them' for 'urban areas'. Remove redundant fillers 'like to umm to keep myself from like umm' and unclear purpose; instead use 'would like to visit'. Streamline verb tenses: 'I've been wanting'→'I would like' for consistency. This addresses sentence structure and tense issues. (Type: Sentence structure errors and Future/Present tense issue.)

× Of course, my country, I born here and live here and I do love my country and I live in Myanmar.

✓ Of course my country — I was born here and I live here; I love my country, Myanmar.

Verb tense error: 'I born here' is incorrect; use passive past 'I was born here'. Remove repetitive 'I live here' by combining phrases. Use commas and dashes correctly. This fixes incorrect verb form and pronoun redundancy. (Type: Verb in the past participle form and Incorrect use of pronouns.)

× So there are so many interesting places like historic places and they have so many like beautiful views, especially in began.

✓ There are many interesting historic places with beautiful views, especially in Bagan.

Redundancy and unclear phrase 'especially in began' (likely 'Bagan'); correct proper noun capitalization. Combine clauses to eliminate repetition 'so many' and 'like'. Use concise structure: 'historic places with beautiful views'. (Type: Sentence structure errors and Incorrect use of adjectives.)

× It is like a historic site and also one of the sites which is like which has reached like UNESCO and.

✓ Bagan is a historic site and is one of the places listed by UNESCO.

Remove repetitive 'like' and incorrect phrase 'which has reached like UNESCO'. Use 'listed by UNESCO' or 'a UNESCO World Heritage Site' for correct expression. Ensure sentence is complete and grammatically correct. (Type: Sentence structure errors and Incorrect use of prepositions.)